Leisure

PUBLIC_FLAG_#{@journal.pf_int} RSS feed of Fentoozler's latest journal entries Jan 23rd 2010 16:26
Alright!

Two days ago I decided to log-in here. I have to admit i was kind of nervous, as you can read in my first entry. Nevertheless now i'm a little bit dissappointed 'cause anybody corrected me. Bu! But anyway, i'm still waiting for someone nice ñ_ñ.

However, this entry is pretty boring, i don't have anything good to comunicate or any funny story, actually, my mind is somewhere else.
Jan 25th 2010 22:10 Dessawy

  • I have to admit i was kind of nervous, as you can read in my first entry.
  • I have to admit i I was kind of nervous, as you can read in my first entry.

 

  • Nevertheless now i'm a little bit dissappointed 'cause anybody corrected me.
  • Nevertheless now i'm I'm a little bit dissappointed 'cause anybody no one corrected me.

 

  • But anyway, i'm still waiting for someone nice ñ_ñ.
  • But anyway, i'm I'm still waiting for someone nice ñ_ñ.

 

  • However, this entry is pretty boring, i don't have anything good to comunicate or any funny story, actually, my mind is somewhere else.
  • However, this entry is pretty boring as i I don't have anything good to comunicate or any funny stories (if you want to refer to only one story you can't use "any"; use "a" instead), actually, my mind is somewhere else.

 
"I" is spelled with capital letter.
(I assume you know that and it just sneaks itself in there anyway :)

Be careful not to overuse words like "however", I know people use it a lot when they speak, but when you write try to use it only when it fits.
Jan 26th 2010 13:13 Fentoozler

Thanks a lot! I feel like little by little you're helping me to clarify all my doubts. You're right about my writing and the overused words. I use to do it when I'm not sure about what to say or what to write.

Thank you!!!
Jan 27th 2010 11:50 Sprachjunge

  • Alright!
  • All right! (Haha native speakers write "alright," but it is incorrect!)

 

  • Two days ago I decided to log-in here.
  • Two days ago I decided to log in here.

 

  • I have to admit i was kind of nervous, as you can read in my first entry.
  • I have to admit that I was kind of nervous, as you can read in my first entry.

 

  • Nevertheless now i'm a little bit dissappointed 'cause anybody corrected me.
  • Nevertheless, now I'm a little bit disappointed because nobody corrected me.

 

  • Bu!
  • Boo!

 

  • But anyway, i'm still waiting for someone nice ñ_ñ.
  • But Anyway, I'm still waiting for someone nice ñ_ñ.

 

  • However, this entry is pretty boring, i don't have anything good to comunicate or any funny story, actually, my mind is somewhere else.
  • However, this entry is pretty boring--I don't have anything good to communicate or any funny story. Actually, my mind is somewhere else.

 
Well written! One thing to watch out for: As a Spanish speaker, many sentence structures that will be correct in Spanish will be what are called "run-ons" and bad style in English. If you look at your last sentence, you'll see what I mean. Basically, at this point in English, the shorter you make your sentences, the better. :) Or, another rule might be: When you want to place a comma, think twice about putting in a hyphen or semicolon, because it probably requires it in English.
Feb 02nd 2010 15:09 Fentoozler

Thank you Sprachjunge for all the feedback! You've helped me a lot! I'll be carefull with all the things you corrected me.

I apologize to you for taking so much time on answering your post. Apparently I got lost for some days hehe.

Thanks again!
Have a nice week!

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