I beg for your help

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Mar 17th 2010 23:09

I will give a talk about earthquake in my English class next Monday.During the talk I have to speak English from the beginning to the end .It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this work before.I have been preparing for it these days.Now I write the words down that I need to say on that day.I beg for your help to correct my words.
Hello everyone.Today I’d like to talk something about earthquakes.So the topic of my talk is The Great Earthquake.There are many earthquakes in the world every year.Some are serious and others are not.The year of the tiger came less than three months,but it has happened three devastating earthquakes in foreign countries.
A earthquake broke out in chili in February 27th,2010,at 2:00 pm.It was 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion.The magnitude was 8.8.From the picture we can see that the houses were collapsed and many people were buried in the ruins.The cars were also destoried by the stone.The rescuers brought the sniffer dogs to find the alive people.The whole country looked like has experienced a war just now.According to the statistics,300 people were dead in that earthquake.Although the dead people was less than people who died in Sichuan earthquake in 2008 in China,it also made people sad.
In Jaruary 14th 2010,a earthquake broke out in Haiti.It was the most serious earthquake in the year of 2010.The center of the earthquake was from Haitian capital Port-au-epicenter about 16 kilometers.The Magnitude was 7.3.There were 2.3 million people dead.It was quiet a large number.The picture showed that the houses became ruins and people were buried.If people were buried and couldn’t be found in time,they would died because of no food and water,babies especially suffered from this.We can see that some people were survived,but almost every survivor was injured.Many people lost their houses and families.Children who lost their parents especially compassionate.At the same time,Haiti received a lot of help from different countries.As an expression like this: A party in trouble, assistance comes from around.I wish them everything goes well and have a good life after the earthquake.
Another earthquake was in Indonesia,it broke out in March 14 th 2010.The center place was in North Maluku province,132 kilometers southeast of Department Labuha areas.The magnitude was 7.Until now,17 people were dead and 50 people were injured.The picture was also horrible.We can see that the whole country was destoried.What make we delighted is that there were less people died than that in Haiti.
Here are the differences among three earthquakes.The magnitude,the lost people,the warning and the reasons of the earthquakes are all different.I give you one minute to read it by yourselves.
Since the earthquake happens so frequently,there are many predictions of the future.Some people believe that the doomsday will come soon. And the erath will be ruined.But the experts don’t agree to it.They say that the whole world just entered the earthquake frequent period.Some time later,the earthquake will disappear.And the human beings will lead a better life.

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Mar 18th 2010 06:16 stan

English
Mandarin , Cantonese

I will give a talk about earthquake in my English class next Monday.
I will give a speech about earthquake in my English class next Monday.

During the talk I have to speak English from the beginning to the end .
During the speech I will have to speak English from the beginning to the end .

It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this work before.
It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this type of work before.

I have been preparing for it these days.
I have been preparing for it, recently (the last few days).

Now I write the words down that I need to say on that day.
Now I will write the words down that I need to say on that day.

Today I’d like to talk something about earthquakes.
Today I’d like to tell you something about earthquakes. (I would use: Today I would like to speak to you about earthquakes.)

So the topic of my talk is The Great Earthquake.
So the topic of my speech is about "The Great Earthquake." (I would use: My speech topic is on/about "The Great Earthquake.")

There are many earthquakes in the world every year.
There are many earthquakes in the world that occur every year. or (Every year, several earthquakes occur around the world)

Some are serious and others are not.
Some are serious and (or you could use: "while") others are not.

The year of the tiger came less than three months,but it has happened three devastating earthquakes in foreign countries.
The year of the tiger arrived less than three months ago, but so far three devastating earthquakes have occurred in foreign countries.

A earthquake broke out in chili in February 27th,2010,at 2:00 pm.
An earthquake occurred in Chile on February 27th, 2010, at 2:00 pm. (I would use: "On February 27th, 2010, around 2:00 PM, a major earthquake occurred in Chile.")

It was 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion.
It occurred 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion.

The magnitude was 8.8.
The magnitude of the earthquake was 8.8. (I would use: The earthquake registered an 8.8 on the Richter scale.)

From the picture we can see that the houses were collapsed and many people were buried in the ruins.
From the pictures (photographs) taken there, we can see that many of the houses had collapsed and that many people were buried in the ruins.

The cars were also destoried by the stone.
Many cars were also destroyed by the collapsing stones and debris.

The rescuers brought the sniffer dogs to find the alive people.
Rescuers brought in many sniffer dogs to search for survivors.

The whole country looked like has experienced a war just now.
The whole country looked (seemed) like it had just experienced a war.

According to the statistics,300 people were dead in that earthquake.
According to the statistics, about 300 people died as a result of the earthquake.

Although the dead people was less than people who died in Sichuan earthquake in 2008 in China,it also made people sad.
Although the number ofdeceased victimswere less than the numbers compared tothe Sichuan earthquake in 2008 that occurred in China, it still caused many people sadness.

In Jaruary 14th 2010,a earthquake broke out in Haiti.
OnJaruary 14th, 2010, an earthquake occurred in Haiti.

It was the most serious earthquake in the year of 2010.
So far it has beenthe most serious earthquake for 2010.

The center of the earthquake was from Haitian capital Port-au-epicenter about 16 kilometers.
The epicenter of the earthquake occurred about (approximately) 16 kilometers from the Haitian capital of Port-au-Prince.

The Magnitude was 7.3.
The Magnitude was 7.3. (I would use: The earthquake registered an 7.3 on the Richter scale.)

There were 2.3 million people dead.
It is estimated that there are about (approximately) 230,000 dead (deceased). Side Note: I don't think 2.3 million died.

It was quiet a large number.
That is quite a large number.

The picture showed that the houses became ruins and people were buried.
Thepictures show that many houses were ruined and many people were buried as a result of the earthquake.

If people were buried and couldn’t be found in time,they would died because of no food and water,babies especially suffered from this.
If the people that were buried were notfound in time, they would have died as a result of not having food and water, babies especially suffered from this danger(babies were especially susceptible to this danger).

We can see that some people were survived,but almost every survivor was injured.
We can see that some people had survived, but almost everyone of the survivors were injured. (I would use: We can see that there were survivors, but most of them suffered injuries.)

Many people lost their houses and families.
Many people lost their homes and families.

Children who lost their parents especially compassionate.
Children who lost their parents especially compassionate. (I'm not sure what you mean by this sentence, so I am going to loosely interpret it: Much people felt compassion especially towards the Children who lost their parents.)

At the same time,Haiti received a lot of help from different countries.
At the same time, Haiti received a lot of help from different countries.

As an expression like this: A party in trouble, assistance comes from around.
As the expression goes: A party in trouble, assistance comes from around. (I know what you mean, but this doesn't make much sense in English).

I wish them everything goes well and have a good life after the earthquake.
I wish (hope)that everything goes well for them and that they will have a good life after the earthquake.

Another earthquake was in Indonesia,it broke out in March 14 th 2010.
Another earthquake occurred in Indonesia that happened on March 14th, 2010.

The center place was in North Maluku province,132 kilometers southeast of Department Labuha areas.
The epicenter occurredin the North Maluku province, 132 kilometers southeast of Labuha.

The magnitude was 7.
The magnitude was 7. (I would use: The earthquake registered an 7.0 on the Richter scale.)

Until now,17 people were dead and 50 people were injured.
Currently, the death toll (count) is 17 deathsand about 50 people were injured.

The picture was also horrible.
The pictures there were also horrible.

We can see that the whole country was destoried.
We can see that the whole (or much of the) country was destroyed.

What make we delighted is that there were less people died than that in Haiti.
What makes us delighted is that there were less deaths than that in Haiti. (This sentence actually sounds a little bad, if you leave it this way. I would use: The only bright spot out of this tragedy is that there were less casualties than those that occurred in Haiti.) or (The only good thing was that there were less deaths than those in Haiti.)

Here are the differences among three earthquakes.
Here are the differences among the three earthquakes.

The magnitude,the lost people,the warning and the reasons of the earthquakes are all different.
The magnitude, the loss oflives, the warnings, and the reasons foreach ofthe earthquakes are all different. (This sentence doesn't make sense to me since you didn't talk about the warnings or the reasons in your speech.)

I give you one minute to read it by yourselves.
I will give you one minute to read this by yourselves.

Since the earthquake happens so frequently,there are many predictions of the future.
Since so many earthquakes have occurred so frequently in this new year, there have been many predictions on (about) the future.

Some people believe that the doomsday will come soon.
Some people believe that "doomsday" will come soon.

And the erath will be ruined.
And that the Earth will be ruined or destroyed.

But the experts don’t agree to it.
But experts have not come to an agreement yet.

They say that the whole world just entered the earthquake frequent period.
They say that the planet has just entered a frequent earthquake period.

Some time later,the earthquake will disappear.
Some time later, the earthquakes will disappear. (I don't think earthquakes will ever disappear so I would use: "Eventually there will be less earthquakes." or "Eventually, the frequency on the amount of earthquakes will return to normal andearthquakes would occur less frequently.")

And the human beings will lead a better life.
And that humans will be able to lead a better life.

I know I wrote a lot, but please read them and use whatever suggestions you want. This is actually a good informative speech about earthquakes, just becareful how you word some of your sentences. It might make sense to some, but the grammar was still a little off. Good job though, I hope you get a good grade as a result of this.

Mar 18th 2010 10:00 gk

English
Mandarin , Korean

I will give a talk about earthquake in my English class next Monday.
(I personally think that talk and speech can be used interchangeably here. ^^)

It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this work before.
It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this kind/type of work(or just without "work")before.

Now I write the words down that I need to say on that day.
Now, I am going to write the words down that I need to say on that day.

Hello everyone.
Hello, everyone.

Today I’d like to talk something about earthquakes.
Today, I would like to tell you about the earthquakes. (Using "talk" is okay here, but I would use "tell" or "speak" as you are the only one speaking most of the time. I think "talk" is more often used when you are actually having a conversation with someone.)

So the topic of my talk is The Great Earthquake.
So The topic of my talk is, "The Great Earthquake."

Some are serious and others are not.
Some are serious and (I agree with the suggestion above. "While" is more colloquially used.)others are not.

The year of the tiger came less than three months,but it has happened three devastating earthquakes in foreign countries.
The year of the tiger came less than three months ago, but there has already beenthree devastating earthquakes in foreign countries.

A earthquake broke out in chili in February 27th,2010,at 2:00 pm.
An earthquake broke out in Chile ("chili" is a spicy stew...^^) on(when using preposition for dates, always use "on")February 27th,2010,at 2:00 pm.

It was 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion.
Its epicenter was 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion.

From the picture we can see that the houses were collapsed and many people were buried in the ruins.
From the picture here, (this is a prepositional phrase; therefore, you have to use a comma.)we can see that the houses were collapsed and many people were buried in the ruins.

The cars were also destoried by the stone.
The cars were also destroyed by the stone. (The above expression is very nice. Use it. ^-^)

The whole country looked like has experienced a war just now.
The whole country looked as if it just had a war.

According to the statistics,300 people were dead in that earthquake.
According to the statistics, about 300 peopledied from the earthquake.

Although the dead people was less than people who died in Sichuan earthquake in 2008 in China,it also made people sad.
Although the number of deaths in Chile were less than those of Sichuan earthquake of China in 2008, it still caused much grief for many people.

In Jaruary 14th 2010,a earthquake broke out in Haiti.
On January 14thof2010, another earthquake broke out in Haiti.

It was the most serious earthquake in the year of 2010.
It has been the most severe (better word choice)earthquakefor the year of 2010 thus far.

The center of the earthquake was from Haitian capital Port-au-epicenter about 16 kilometers.
The epicenter (I think the "of the earthquake" is unnecessary as epicenter is already associated with earthquake. It'll be redundant to use that phrase.)wasabout 16 kilometersfrom Haitian capital,Port-au-Prince.

The Magnitude was 7.3.
The magnitude was 7.3.

There were 2.3 million people dead.
Approximately 200,000(be careful with the conversion of numbers...）people died.

Another earthquake was in Indonesia,it broke out in March 14 th 2010.
Another earthquake occurred in Indonesia on March 14th, 2010.

Nicely written! Stan has made some great corrections. I just added a few of my suggestions. :) Have fun with your oral presentation!

Mar 18th 2010 10:22 LaoBai

English
Mandarin

I will give a talk about earthquake in my English class next Monday.
I will give a talk about earthquake in my English class next Monday. ---不用改---

During the talk I have to speak English from the beginning to the end .
During the talk I have to speak English from the beginning to the end . -------不用改---

It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this work before.
It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this work before.

I have been preparing for it these days.
I have been preparing for it recently.

Today I’d like to talk something about earthquakes.
Today I’d like to tell you something about earthquakes.

So the topic of my talk is The Great Earthquake.
So the topic of my talk is The Great Earthquake. --------- 不用改

There are many earthquakes in the world every year.
There are many earthquakes in the world every year. ---不用改

Some are serious and others are not.
Some are serious and others are not. ---不用改

The year of the tiger came less than three months,but it has happened three devastating earthquakes in foreign countries.
The year of the tiger began less than three months ago, but it has happened three devastating earthquakes have already happened in foreign countries.

A earthquake broke out in chili in February 27th,2010,at 2:00 pm.
An earthquake occurred in chili on February 27th,2010,at 2:00 pm.

It was 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion.
It was 91 kilometers northeast of Concepcion. ---不用改

The magnitude was 8.8.
The magnitude was 8.8. ---不用改

From the picture we can see that the houses were collapsed and many people were buried in the ruins.
From the pictures we can see that the houses were collapsed and many people were buried in the ruins.

The cars were also destoried by the stone.
Many cars were also destroyed by the stones.

The rescuers brought the sniffer dogs to find the alive people.
The rescuers brought the sniffer dogs to find the alive people who were buried.

The whole country looked like has experienced a war just now.
The whole country looked like it has experienced a war just now.

According to the statistics,300 people were dead in that earthquake.
According to the statistics,300 people died in that earthquake.

Although the dead people was less than people who died in Sichuan earthquake in 2008 in China,it also made people sad.
Although the dead people were less than the people who died in the Sichuan earthquake in 2008 in China,it still made people sad.

In Jaruary 14th 2010,a earthquake broke out in Haiti.
In Jaruary 14th 2010,an earthquake occurred in Haiti.

It was the most serious earthquake in the year of 2010.
It was the most serious earthquake in the year of 2010. -- 不用改

The center of the earthquake was from Haitian capital Port-au-epicenter about 16 kilometers.
The center of the earthquake was about 16 kilometers from Haitian capital, Port-au-Prince .

The Magnitude was 7.3.
The Magnitude was 7.3. 不用改

There were 2.3 million people dead.
There were 2.3 million people dead. 不用改230，000 = 二十三万 = two hundred thirty thousand

It was quiet a large number.
It was quite a large number.

The picture showed that the houses became ruins and people were buried.
The pictures showed that the houses became ruins and people were buried.

If people were buried and couldn’t be found in time,they would died because of no food and water,babies especially suffered from this.
If people were buried and couldn’t be found in time,they would die because of no food and water; babies especially suffered from this.

We can see that some people were survived,but almost every survivor was injured.
We can see that some people were survived,but almost every survivor was injured.

Many people lost their houses and families.
Many people lost their houses and families. -- 不能改

Children who lost their parents especially compassionate.
Children who lost their parents made everyone feel especially compassionate.

At the same time,Haiti received a lot of help from different countries.
At the same time,Haiti received a lot of help from different countries. --不能改

As an expression like this: A party in trouble, assistance comes from around.
As the expression goes : Whena party is in trouble, assistance comes from all around.

I wish them everything goes well and have a good life after the earthquake.
I wish everything goes well for them and they have a good life after the earthquake.

Another earthquake was in Indonesia,it broke out in March 14 th 2010.
Another earthquake was in Indonesia,it happened in March 14 th 2010.

The center place was in North Maluku province,132 kilometers southeast of Department Labuha areas.
The center place was in North Maluku province,132 kilometers southeast of Department Labuha areas.

The magnitude was 7.
The magnitude was 7. 不能改

Until now,17 people were dead and 50 people were injured.
Up until now,17 people have dead and 50 people were injured.

The picture was also horrible.
The pictures were also horrible.

We can see that the whole country was destoried.
We can see that much of the whole country was destroyed.

What make we delighted is that there were less people died than that in Haiti.
What make glad is that there were less people died than that in Haiti.

The magnitude,the lost people,the warning and the reasons of the earthquakes are all different.
The magnitude,the lost people,the warning and the reasons for the earthquakes are all different.

Since the earthquake happens so frequently,there are many predictions of the future.
Since the earthquakes happen so frequently,there are many predictions for the future.

But the experts don’t agree to it.
But the experts don’t agree on it.

They say that the whole world just entered the earthquake frequent period.
They say that the whole world just entered a frequent earthquake frequent period.

Some time later,the earthquake will disappear.
Some time later,the earthquakes will disappear.

And the human beings will lead a better life.
And the human beings will lead a better life.

写得很好！

Mar 18th 2010 11:31 kaschka

English
Mandarin , German , Spanish , Japanese , Tagalog , French

I will give a talk about earthquake in my English class next Monday.
I will (have to) give a speech on talk about earthquakes in for my English class next Monday. (I think "I will give a talk on" and "I will give a speech on" are interchangeable :))

It’s a challege for me because my native language is Chinese and I have never done this work before.
It’s a challenge for me, because my native language is Chinese and I have never done anything like this work before.