Whom Would You Save First? Mother, or Wife?
Dec 16th 2008 00:11
There is an ever question in China, which girls/women often ask their boyfriends or husbands:
"If one day your Mother and I fall into the river in the same time while both of us can't swim, WHOM WOULD YOU SAVE FIRST?"
Of course, it's a question without standard answer, but it can always bother the man. :P
That's because the mother is very important to one in Chinese tradition, as important as the wife/husband even more important. But even a man love his mother more than his woman, he can't say it straightly for it will hurt her feeling. But in the other hand, even a man doesn't love her mother a lot, he also can't say he would give up his mother for it sounds kinda immoral.
In China, it is said a man has two lovers, two important women in his life - mother and wife. So they may fight for him. XD. Mother&daughter-in-law is a big society problem in today's China, a lot of stories are about this. And that's why the question is so welcomed - girl always want to know who is more important to her lover.
It's a Chinese men's trouble. And what do you think of this question as a westerner? I'd like to hear your answer. :)
"If one day your Mother and I fall into the river in the same time while both of us can't swim, WHOM WOULD YOU SAVE FIRST?"
Of course, it's a question without standard answer, but it can always bother the man. :P
That's because the mother is very important to one in Chinese tradition, as important as the wife/husband even more important. But even a man love his mother more than his woman, he can't say it straightly for it will hurt her feeling. But in the other hand, even a man doesn't love her mother a lot, he also can't say he would give up his mother for it sounds kinda immoral.
In China, it is said a man has two lovers, two important women in his life - mother and wife. So they may fight for him. XD. Mother&daughter-in-law is a big society problem in today's China, a lot of stories are about this. And that's why the question is so welcomed - girl always want to know who is more important to her lover.
It's a Chinese men's trouble. And what do you think of this question as a westerner? I'd like to hear your answer. :)
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It should not be asked.
Don't you have a saying in Chinese?
人比人気死人
I can't type well in Chinese, but it is supposed to mean, if people compare people, everyone will die of anger.
I think that is the case here.
Who Would You Save First? Your Mother or Your Wife?
There is a common question in China, which girls/women often ask their boyfriends or husbands:
"If one day your mother and I fall into the river in the same time, and both of us can't swim, WHO WOULD YOU SAVE FIRST?" (the word mother begins with a capital letter only if it is used as a name.)
Of course, it's a question without an answer, but it always bother men.
That's because a mother is very important to one in the Chinese tradition, as important as the wife/husband, or even more important.
But even if a man loves his mother more than his wife, he can't tell her straight to the face for it will hurt her feelings.
But on the other hand, even if a man doesn't love his mother a lot, he also can't say he would save his wife instead for it sounds immoral.
In China, it is said that a man has two lovers, two important women in his life - his mother and his wife.
Mother&daughter-in-law relationship is a big society problem in today's China, and a lot of stories about this are written.
And that's why the question is so common - a girl always wants to know who is more important to her lover.
However, it is troublesome to a Chinese man.
So what do you think of this question as a Westerner?
and to kfmfe04:
yes it's a stupid question that shouldn't be asked by a mature woman. but sometimes girls can only grow up through stupid love.
Who Would You Save First?Your Mother or your Wife?
There is an eternal question in China, which girls/women often ask their boyfriends or husbands:
"If one day your Mother and I fall into the river at the same time while both of us can't swim, WHO WOULD YOU SAVE FIRST?"
Of course, it's a question without easy answer, but it can always bother the man.
That's because the mother is very important to sons/daughters in Chinese tradition, as important as the wife/husband even more important.
But even if a man loves his mother more than his woman, he can't say it bluntly because it would hurt her feelings.
But on the other hand,if a man doesn't love her mother a lot, he also can't say he would give up his mother for it sounds kinda immoral.
In China, it is said a man has two lovers, two important women in his life -his mother and his wife.
So they may fight over him.
XD.
The Mother&daughter-in-law relationship is a big problem for society in today's China, a lot of stories are told about this.
And that's why the question is so welcomed - the girl always want to know who is more important to her lover.
However,It's a Chinese man's dilemma.
So what do you think of this question as a Westerner?
I'd like to hear your answer.
If you can only save one....the only option as an Englishman would be to jump
in and drown with them.....I can't swim!
But in the theoretical opinion, I think mother is very old and have few years to live even she was saved, but the wife is the partner that have a long time to live with the man. should her be more worth to be saved? On the other hand, lover can also be apart in years shorter than a mother can be the mother. Even from the theoretical "economics", it's still a complecated question.
It's a stupid, pointless question.
no offense ^^
I would rescue my girlfriend first. But she is a good swimmer. Maybe I should rescue my mother first. She swims like a stone.
I do not think that anyone in Germany would feel offended by this question.
My mother would not expect to be rescued first.
But the real question is equally as grating and unfair. Comparing a familial love to a romantic one is comparing apples to oranges. The real concern is, is to what extent is he going to allow his mother to dominate their life and marriage. You can't ask him to "love" her more than his mother, it just doesn't work that way. What should be asked is that he should have a more independent spirit to be able to tell his mother that he respects her wishes but that his wife isn't her and isn't going to be just like her and that in return she should respect his wishes to allow his family to operate the way he wants it to.
Unless of course they're being abusive or negligent. Then I completely understand intervening. If I discovered my grandchildren were being abused, I'd have my own son or daughter arrested immediately if they were the ones responsible. And I'd still be driven to smacking them good if they knew about it and let it happen, but weren't doing it themselves and go as far as testify in court that they're unfit to raise children. There's no excuse for that.
I'd kill myself first
Wow, Jesse, I like these sentences. Yeah, it's the problem. In today's china, I think most of the family problems bettween mothers and daughters-in-law in fact are the falt of the men. When a man can't deny what his mother or wife asks and be controled by them, women may fight for controling. Especially when both of the women live in a house, and both of them thought they're the hostess of the family, war begins^^
!?!?!?!? Really? If so, that's a really good reason NOT to get married...
and it's concerned with the chinese culture, because in the past mother is the hostess of a family while wife is in a lower class. But with the time changes, more and more 2-persons-families appeared instead of the big families live with men's parents. I think there should be fewer such problems in US
If my wife and my daughter are being drowned, I don't hesitate to save the daughter first, because it may be an animal's instinct. Now if my wife and my mother.....difficult to select.....
I think your wife also wish you to save your daughter first!