One year has past from when I came back to Japan.

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Aug 01st 2010 00:23
Dear Judi & Geoff
How are you and are you enjoying your weekend?
In Japan, this summer has been extremely hot everyday, almost all days have been over the 30 degrees.
Especially during the day, it would be 35 degrees, so if you are here, you might be boiled or to be sick for the heat.
By the way, today is31st of July, is the day I came back to Japan in last year, so one year has past from then.
Now, I completely settled down in my way of life, and I'm finding a lot of interesting things to do recently.
I'm enjoying to read English children's literature, to study English and to have good time with many overseas students.
It was really long time for that and to be settled me down.
Initially I had got terrible homesick, it was unexpected strong and fiery, so I've been confusing my identity at that time.
When the last Christmas, I missed you maximum.
I often couldn't help to tear when I remembered you and the experiences in your home.
In winter June to March, I had been very depressed, because I was not able to start to write any stories though I didn't look for any job for keeping my freedom from work for writing.
I understood now why I couldn't write anything, it because my motivation came from showing worthwhile of me off to the people, not desire for the expressions my criativety. No one can create from vanity.
I found one more important thing is my deep inferiority complex in me again.
While it had been long time, I have denied to recognize it and escaped to some addictions, for example I had been workaholic for twenty years, and playing the PC games, eating sweets also.
I overcomed the fare to face the real myself and accepted that, then I was able to stop any addiction completely.
I live in secure world, and try to new challenge things. I read a lot of English stories, and try to write some stories in English.
I'm exciting to do that and enjoy them very much.
I often remember and appreciate for the advices which Judi gave me,
"Keep listening if you can't understand. It will make you became to understand the television story sometime."
"Spoken English is really different from reading and writing, so if you want to progress it, you need to talk with people more and more."
"Making mistake is really important for to learn about something. If you get knowledge without any mistakes, it will not stay in you. So, don't be disappoint if you made mistake."

These saying are really true still now, and I'm finding the meaningful of them in everyday.
Today is just one year past from the day I came back to Japan, and I'm pleased to say that I'm settled and secure, so then I'm enjoying my life and appreciated everything you have done for me all of the time.
If I didn't meet with Judi and Geoff, I couldn't find the meaning of my life and accept myself as just I am.
Thank you very much indeed for accepting me as a part of your family for a while, and keeping touch with me still now.
See you soon.
Lots of love from Shigeko