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Compositon Practice 1 (Please Correct Errors)

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  • English 
Jun 23rd 2011 22:26
Subject: "Do you think the voting age should be lowered from 20 to 18?"


I think it is too early for teenagers to have the right to vote. It is true that in many countries 18 or 19 year old people have voting right, but half of these people are enrolled in a college or university. This means half of them haven't large experience in a society, and they are not able to elect persons who are really needed for their community. Thus, I don't agree with the opinion of lowering the voting age.
pein87
Thank you for your correction!
Jun 24th 2011 11:51
  • It is true that in many countries 18 or 19 year old people have voting right, but half of these people are enrolled in a college or university.

  • It's true that in many countries people who are 18 or 19 do have the right to vote, but half of them are enrolled in either college or a university.

 
  • This means half of them haven't large experience in a society, and they are not able to elect persons who are really needed for their community.

  • This means that half of them do not have enough experience in society, and this makes them unsuitable to elect officials who are right for their community.

 
You did pretty good. Your English believe it or not is awesome. You did have some grammar problems but only a few so no big deal on that. A lot of the minor issues are word usage and word placement but the good news is even us American's get it wrong. Good job but when your writing read it out loud to yourself and say does this sound right. When you make word placement mistakes its on accident and reading it out loud as is lets you see how it sounds to others and if it sounds good then it probably is. Just remember the placement of the word plays a key part, and so does the words being used.
Jun 24th 2011 14:26 Keisuke
Thanks for the advice!
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Subject: "Do you think the voting age should be lowered from 20 to 18?" I think it is too early for teenagers to have the right to vote. It is true that in many countries 18 or 19 year old people have voting right, but half of these people are enrolled in a college or university. This means hal


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