please correct my English composition

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Nov 05th 2011 22:11

Please correct in writing

①
Each person has a different way to enjoy traveling.
旅の楽しみ方は人それぞれであろう。
Certainly it is good to go sightseeing, but as for me, food is more important.
観光もよいが、私ならまず食べ物である。

②
Immortality and eternal youth is a dream of human.
不老不死は人類の夢である。
However,if it were to be realized,the earth would be full of people.
しかし、もしそれが実現したら、地球上は人で一杯になってしまうだろう。

③
If you watch the movie again after a while which you have watched before,
以前に見た映画を,間をおいてもう一度見ると、
you will be surprised to get completely different impression.
印象がまったく違うのに驚くことがある。

25
13
4
English

Nov 05th 2011 22:23 Sarahu

English
Japanese

Immortality and eternal youth is a dream of human.
Immortality and eternal youth are the dreams of humanity.

1 people think this correction is good.

However,if it were to be realized,the earth would be full of people.
However, if they were to be realized, the earth would be full of people.

1 people think this correction is good.

If you watch the movie again after a while which you have watched before,
If you watch a movie you've already seen again after a while,

1 people think this correction is good.

you will be surprised to get completely different impression.
you would be surprised if you got a completely different impression.

Well done :D

Nov 08th 2011 22:36 yusuke

Thank you for your correcting.
By the way, what does this "D" mean?

Nov 09th 2011 05:06 GDoe5

:D is a face, or an emoticon. It's super happy!

Nov 09th 2011 08:45 Sarahu

GDoe5 is correct! It means "^0^" or "（笑）", but the western version :D

Nov 05th 2011 22:30 GDoe5

English
Japanese , French

Certainly it is good to go sightseeing, but as for me, food is more important.
Certainly it is good to go sightseeing, but as for me, I think food is more important.

1 people think this correction is good.

Immortality and eternal youth is a dream of human.
Immortality and eternal youth is a dream of a human.

However,if it were to be realized,the earth would be full of people.
However,if it were to be realized,the earth would be full of people.However, if we managed this, the earth would be full of people.

If you watch the movie again after a while which you have watched before,
If you re-watch a movie again after a while which you have watched before,

you will be surprised to get completely different impression.
you will be surprised and you'll get a completely different impression.

1 people think this correction is good.

Very good!
Red is corrections.
Blue is suggestions.

Nov 08th 2011 22:38 yusuke

Thank you very much.

Nov 08th 2011 23:11 yusuke

If you re-watch a movie again after a while which you have watched before,

I see!

Nov 09th 2011 05:05 GDoe5

You're wlecome!

Nov 05th 2011 22:40 オタク機動隊

Mandarin
Japanese , Cantonese

うわー、レミリア・スカーレットだ！

Nov 06th 2011 02:00 ravenex

レミさんだった。ヤイ！

Nov 08th 2011 22:40 yusuke

どうも、レミリアです

Nov 08th 2011 23:20 オタク機動隊

どうもどうも、博麗霊夢です（笑）

Nov 05th 2011 22:44 Dave

English
Japanese

Please correct in writing
Please correct in my writing

Each person has a different way to enjoy traveling.
Each person enjoys travel has a differently. way to enjoy traveling. or you can say "Each person enjoys travel in their own way".

Certainly it is good to go sightseeing, but as for me, food is more important.
Certainly it is good to go sightseeing, but as for me, food is more important. Of course, sightseeing is fine, but for me, food is more important.

Immortality and eternal youth is a dream of human.
Immortality and eternal youth are is a dream of human fantasies.

However,if it were to be realized,the earth would be full of people.
However, if it both were to be realized possible, the earth would be full of people. or you can say "the earth would be overcrowded", or "every city would be as crowded as Hong Kong", etc.

If you watch the movie again after a while which you have watched before,
If you watch a the movie again long after seeing it for the first time, after a while which you have watched before,