俳句
May 25th 2009 00:57
俳句
haiku
It's been too long since I wrote a journal.
I have been inspired to write a haiku.
Please accept it.
それは長くても日記を書いた。
俳句を書くことが触発されている。これを受け入れください。
曇りです。
風とひまわり
が揉み合う。
a cloudy day...the sunflowers jostle with the wind.
I have been inspired to write a haiku.
Please accept it.
それは長くても日記を書いた。
俳句を書くことが触発されている。これを受け入れください。
曇りです。
風とひまわり
が揉み合う。
a cloudy day...the sunflowers jostle with the wind.
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日記を書くまでに長くかかってしまいました。
むしょうに俳句が書きたくなってしまいました。
是非読んでみてください。
曇りの日 OR 今日くもり
からみあう OR ゆれうごく
風にもまれ ひまわりゆれる 曇りの日
ステキな俳句ですね！
ふたつの訳（やく）ともいいですね。
「風になびく」ということばもいいかなあ・・・・
それは長くても日記を書いた。（すごく久しぶりに日記を書いた）
曇りです。（曇り空）
が揉み合う。（おしくらまんじゅう＝play push and shove）
久しぶりに日記を書いた。
いい趣味ですね。＾＾
前の日記からしばらく経ってしまいました。
So,
が揉み合う
part doesn't work like that.
Though, it is impressive that you understand the 5 - 7 - 5 rule and make up a haiku by yourself. The image is beautiful, and it is good haiku that have us imagine the beautiful sight.
One more thing is, haiku doesn't need 「。」in the end. So you shouldn't put it.
If I could rewrite, I would say....
曇り空
風と揉み合う
ひまわりや
We often put「や」in the end of a noun in haiku. Hope you like it.
久しぶりに日記を書いた。
是非読んでみてください。I agree with the previous corrector.
Thank you so much for you message. I am happy that you thinking about when you heard about Thailand :) I feel warm from your message.
well in Thailand is not bad. if we did not pass the place that they have protese we can stay safe ^^; but they are stay at my faverit place that I like LOL
I think budha will potect every one in Thailand and can see the way to manage the every problem in our country.
How about is your Japanese now I did not come to lang-8 for a while Is my friend is happy :)
One again. Thank you for you corrected my journal entry.
I am happy that you happy to read my journal.
I did not see you on lang-8 for along time. Are you busy? I dont' know because of I did not visit lang-8 often or not or because of you did not come here often.
Keep up you Japanese.I wish you have a wonderful day
night night.
Noy
すごく久しぶりに日記を書いた。
とても俳句が書きたい気分だ。
素敵ですね！